“I work to live and NOT live to work”. This is my mantra. If I feel stressed, I slow down a bit. I want things to be at my own pacing and to take things easy.
Working for this company, means I have to embrace all the pressure that comes with it. Yes, I can do that! I can even give my more than 100% at work. Provided…(and let me repeat that) provided they give what is due for me. Everything should be 2-way.
I’m no hero. Maybe 5 years ago, I was. I was working to get experience. But now, (come on let’s get REAL!) I’m working to earn and prepare for my future. Not only for me but also for my future family.
I feel we are almost there…nobody wants to talk about details because of surety issues or maybe some “fears of the unknown”. Well, personally that is my feeling! Sheeesh! I don’t know how to overcome this. Can someone help me? (I wish...)
Wednesday, July 26, 2006
Thursday, July 06, 2006
Marrying the Right Person
EVERY relationship has a cycle. In the beginning, you fell in love with your spouse. You anticipated their call, wanted their touch, and liked their idiosyncrasies. Falling in love with your spouse wasn’t hard. In fact, it was a completely natural and spontaneous experience. You didn’t have to DO anything. That’s why it’s called “falling” in love…because it’s happening TO YOU.
People in love sometimes say, “I was swept of my feet.” Think about the imagery of that expression. It implies that you were just standing there; doing nothing, and then something came along and happened TO YOU.
Falling in love is easy. It’s a passive and spontaneous experience.
But after a few years of marriage, the euphoria of love fades. It’s the natural cycle of EVERY relationship. Slowly but surely, phone calls become a bother (if they come at all), touch is not always welcome (when it happens), and your spouse’s idiosyncrasies, instead of being cute, drive you nuts.
The symptoms of this stage vary with every relationship, but if you think about your marriage, you will notice a dramatic difference between the initial stage when you were in love and a much duller or even angry subsequent stage.
At this point, you and/or your spouse might start asking, “Did I marry the right person?” And as you and your spouse reflect on the euphoria of the love you once had, you may begin to desire that experience with someone else. This is when marriages breakdown. People blame their spouse for their unhappiness and look outside their marriage for fulfillment. Extramarital fulfillment comes in all shapes and sizes. Infidelity is the most obvious. But sometimes people turn to work, church, a hobby, a friendship, excessive TV, or abusive substances.
But the answer to this dilemma does NOT lie outside your marriage. It lies within it.
I’m not saying that you couldn’t fall in love with someone else. You could. And TEMPORARILY you’d feel better. But you’d be in the same situation a few years later. Because (listen carefully to this):
THE KEY TO SUCCEEDING IN MARRIAGE IS NOT FINDING THE RIGHT PERSON; IT’S LEARNING TO LOVE THE PERSON YOU FOUND.
SUSTAINING love is not a passive or spontaneous experience. It’ll NEVER just happen to you. You can’t “find” LASTING love. You have to “make” it day in and day out. That’s why we have the expression “the labor of love”. Because it takes time, effort, and energy. And most importantly, it takes WISDOM. You have to know WHAT TO DO to make your marriage work.
Make no mistake about it. Love is NOT a mystery. There are specific things you can do (with or without your spouse) to succeed with your marriage. Just as there are physical laws of the universe (such as gravity), there are also laws for relationships. Just as the right diet and exercise program makes you physically stronger, certain habits in your relationship WILL make your marriage stronger. It’s a direct cause and effect. If you know and apply the laws, the results are predictable…you can “make” love.
LOVE IN MARRIAGE IS INDEED A “DECISION”…NOT JUST A FEELING.
People in love sometimes say, “I was swept of my feet.” Think about the imagery of that expression. It implies that you were just standing there; doing nothing, and then something came along and happened TO YOU.
Falling in love is easy. It’s a passive and spontaneous experience.
But after a few years of marriage, the euphoria of love fades. It’s the natural cycle of EVERY relationship. Slowly but surely, phone calls become a bother (if they come at all), touch is not always welcome (when it happens), and your spouse’s idiosyncrasies, instead of being cute, drive you nuts.
The symptoms of this stage vary with every relationship, but if you think about your marriage, you will notice a dramatic difference between the initial stage when you were in love and a much duller or even angry subsequent stage.
At this point, you and/or your spouse might start asking, “Did I marry the right person?” And as you and your spouse reflect on the euphoria of the love you once had, you may begin to desire that experience with someone else. This is when marriages breakdown. People blame their spouse for their unhappiness and look outside their marriage for fulfillment. Extramarital fulfillment comes in all shapes and sizes. Infidelity is the most obvious. But sometimes people turn to work, church, a hobby, a friendship, excessive TV, or abusive substances.
But the answer to this dilemma does NOT lie outside your marriage. It lies within it.
I’m not saying that you couldn’t fall in love with someone else. You could. And TEMPORARILY you’d feel better. But you’d be in the same situation a few years later. Because (listen carefully to this):
THE KEY TO SUCCEEDING IN MARRIAGE IS NOT FINDING THE RIGHT PERSON; IT’S LEARNING TO LOVE THE PERSON YOU FOUND.
SUSTAINING love is not a passive or spontaneous experience. It’ll NEVER just happen to you. You can’t “find” LASTING love. You have to “make” it day in and day out. That’s why we have the expression “the labor of love”. Because it takes time, effort, and energy. And most importantly, it takes WISDOM. You have to know WHAT TO DO to make your marriage work.
Make no mistake about it. Love is NOT a mystery. There are specific things you can do (with or without your spouse) to succeed with your marriage. Just as there are physical laws of the universe (such as gravity), there are also laws for relationships. Just as the right diet and exercise program makes you physically stronger, certain habits in your relationship WILL make your marriage stronger. It’s a direct cause and effect. If you know and apply the laws, the results are predictable…you can “make” love.
LOVE IN MARRIAGE IS INDEED A “DECISION”…NOT JUST A FEELING.
Tuesday, July 04, 2006
The NEW me...errr...The BETTER me
It’s been long since my last blah-blah here. Well, there’s much updating we need to do. Let’s start.
1. I’m back to reading
I’m currently reading this “The 10 Women You’ll be Before You’re 35”. It’s hilarious and yet inspirational. It’s a good book for me and for you guys as well. Must-read!
2. I’ve quit smoking!
Yes, you’ve read it right and clear. It’s about time to remove all the toxins in my body. This time, it’s for REAL. Stress is part of my everyday life. SPICE, that’s what I want to call it but still, I can do away with cigs. I’m so proud of myself. *applause* I admire my self-control and I’m also surprised I’m not tempted at all. I don’t miss and look for it anymore. I’m happy I was able to kick the habit. FINALLY!
Had my business trip in Kuala Lumpur and stayed in Hotel Hilton. I was startled when I asked for a NON-SMOKING room! Muwahaha! This is my first trip without any cigs in my trunk.
3. I’m into Bikram Yoga
Hahaha! Some of you might think what’s with me…Am I insane? I’m completely NORMAL! After quitting smoking, now here comes yoga. I can see those smiles on your faces and big round eyes with mouth-opened reactions. I’m serious; I want to be fit and healthy. Not just for me, but for my future family.
It’s about time to think for long-term plans, dear!
4. Party Girl NO MORE
Coffee or a couple of drinks after dinner is better to keep in touch with friends. I find it very relaxing.
5. SPA
I’m a relaxation (read: in any form) addict! I feel I deserve it. With a very fast-paced life I have now, I ought to slow down a bit and breathe. Time flies so fast and I don’t wanna miss life.
6. Save, Save, Save
I’m trying! It’s hard but there’s an effort.
7. All Positive
As much as possible, I want to fill my mind with nicer and finer things in life. Incase life turns not as expected, I stop a bit to breathe, pray, go on and fight. Life is a never-ending battle. Success is not measured on how long you are on top but on how determined you are to get up from failures or mistakes in life. Bottomline, you learn then, share your experiences to others whether good or bad.
If things work out more than you expected, learn how to pay it forward.
CHANGE cannot be dictated or forced by anybody. Be it your dad, mom, BF, friends, doctor, etc. it will never work. Errr…maybe it will, but only temporary because you are just trying to please someone.
CHANGE should start from within. If you embrace change, everything will fall into place more than you expect. To change for the better is a personal decision.
I always want to be a better person. I don’t want to be afraid of change. I don’t want to be anxious of leaving my comfort zone. Because I want to better improve my personality and grow more.
The main title of this blog says it all: Carpe Diem! I want to experience life as much as I can. I don’t want to miss life. I want to share my life to people. I want to touch people’s life in the simplest way I can.
I guess that’ s life all about. Touching people’s lives.
1. I’m back to reading
I’m currently reading this “The 10 Women You’ll be Before You’re 35”. It’s hilarious and yet inspirational. It’s a good book for me and for you guys as well. Must-read!
2. I’ve quit smoking!
Yes, you’ve read it right and clear. It’s about time to remove all the toxins in my body. This time, it’s for REAL. Stress is part of my everyday life. SPICE, that’s what I want to call it but still, I can do away with cigs. I’m so proud of myself. *applause* I admire my self-control and I’m also surprised I’m not tempted at all. I don’t miss and look for it anymore. I’m happy I was able to kick the habit. FINALLY!
Had my business trip in Kuala Lumpur and stayed in Hotel Hilton. I was startled when I asked for a NON-SMOKING room! Muwahaha! This is my first trip without any cigs in my trunk.
3. I’m into Bikram Yoga
Hahaha! Some of you might think what’s with me…Am I insane? I’m completely NORMAL! After quitting smoking, now here comes yoga. I can see those smiles on your faces and big round eyes with mouth-opened reactions. I’m serious; I want to be fit and healthy. Not just for me, but for my future family.
It’s about time to think for long-term plans, dear!
4. Party Girl NO MORE
Coffee or a couple of drinks after dinner is better to keep in touch with friends. I find it very relaxing.
5. SPA
I’m a relaxation (read: in any form) addict! I feel I deserve it. With a very fast-paced life I have now, I ought to slow down a bit and breathe. Time flies so fast and I don’t wanna miss life.
6. Save, Save, Save
I’m trying! It’s hard but there’s an effort.
7. All Positive
As much as possible, I want to fill my mind with nicer and finer things in life. Incase life turns not as expected, I stop a bit to breathe, pray, go on and fight. Life is a never-ending battle. Success is not measured on how long you are on top but on how determined you are to get up from failures or mistakes in life. Bottomline, you learn then, share your experiences to others whether good or bad.
If things work out more than you expected, learn how to pay it forward.
CHANGE cannot be dictated or forced by anybody. Be it your dad, mom, BF, friends, doctor, etc. it will never work. Errr…maybe it will, but only temporary because you are just trying to please someone.
CHANGE should start from within. If you embrace change, everything will fall into place more than you expect. To change for the better is a personal decision.
I always want to be a better person. I don’t want to be afraid of change. I don’t want to be anxious of leaving my comfort zone. Because I want to better improve my personality and grow more.
The main title of this blog says it all: Carpe Diem! I want to experience life as much as I can. I don’t want to miss life. I want to share my life to people. I want to touch people’s life in the simplest way I can.
I guess that’ s life all about. Touching people’s lives.
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